Matthew19::Divorce

Matthew 19

Have you ever read something, knowing that you had the opportunity to post something and you could hardly make it through because you were so excited to write about what you were reading? Yeah, that's not me this morning.

Jesus' teaching in chapter nineteen is difficult. It's difficult to discuss when over 2/3 of marriages in our culture end in divorce. I hope you know that I do not take this subject lightly, nor do I expect the teaching to sit well with everyone who reads these words. I do, however, want to respond to what I read in the first twelve verses this morning.

The Pharisees were badgering Jesus again, hoping to catch him in a slip-up when it comes to the letter of the Mosaic Law. They ask if it's legal for a man to divorce his wife for any reason. These were not honest, broken people who are struggling in a marriage that exhibits nothing but heartache, anger, frustration, pain, etc.. These were men with an agenda - and the agenda had nothing to do with marriage.

Jesus responds directly to these men. There is no need to be sensitive, no need to be compassionate and no need to be empathetic. He states the letter of the law emphatically back to them. A man and woman were made for a union that was not intended to be broken by anything. Concessions were made because of our hardheartedness, not by God's design. If there is infidelity in the marriage, there is wiggle room when it comes to divorce. If there is not, it doesn't appear so according to the law. It is important to remember that permission is a concession, not part of God's plan. There you go. You have your answer to all your questions. You can call Elin Woods and tell her that she has permission to divorce Tiger.

How are we supposed to respond to this? What if we weren't Christians when we got married, are we still bound to the same "laws" that govern a Christ-follower? What if one spouse is not a Christ-follower? What if there is abuse? What if we just can't get along? What if...what if...what if...what if? I realize that we can come up with all kinds of scenarios to fit our situation and make our situation sound different and more justified. The bottom line is the bottom line, though...isn't it?

Based on my reading of this passage, I know that divorce is not God's plan. Period. It's not his plan in ANY situation. If we divorce, we fall short of God's plan for our marriage. If we divorce, we miss the mark that was intended. If we divorce, we sin. In eight days, we will read a chapter that explains what happened to that sin. We will see how ugly our divorce was in the eyes of the Father. We will see what our divorces cost. The price tag on our divorce is no different than the price tag on my slander, or my gossip, or my lust, or my jealousy, or my...or my...or my... If you have never been through a divorce and feel like you've got a special place in God's little world because of your "faithfulness," remember that the log in your eye might just be blocking your view. If you have been divorced, I hope you know that the Father has not left you or turned his back on you. He still has plans for you and His purposes in you do not have to be thwarted because of a failure on your part OR a failure on the part of your spouse.

If it's a struggle right now and you don't see hope, it's still there. Father can redeem the most dire of situations and breathe life into any relationship. If you have been wronged or violated, you have every right to be angry, hurt, upset and maybe to even leave, but God might have something larger in store for you. If you have wronged or violated your spouse, you screwed up. Yes. But it's not the end of His relationship with you. Father wants you...He wants your heart. He wants to redeem you through humility. Don't give up.

I realize that it's hardly fair to open up a subject like this, but I wanted to remain faithful to my commitment through this book - read and open up what stands out to me. I know I could have studied more and brought more to the discussion. I could have probably been more sensitive or more definitive in spots, but this is where I am and what I felt like sharing. I'd love to hear some of your thoughts. We are not Pharisees trying to trick you, but we would love to hear your heart regarding this sensitive subject. What has Father taught you?