I read an article last week about what one person considers the makings of a good neighbor. The author wrote, "All in all, there may be many qualities you expect from a good neighbor. As for me, if I could choose a neighbor myself, that would be a helpful, reliable and incurious one." It's interesting because the curious neighbor is not a neighbor that cares about them, but one who is meddling for the sake of obtaining the latest gossip in the hood - you know the type. The one who watches out their window to see what time the kids come home, or who comes to the houses, or who stays over at the houses. Nobody wants a neighbor like that, but many people want the kind of neighbor that is helpful, reliable and genuinely concerned for their well-being and the betterment of the neighborhood. Those are the kinds of neighbors we want to be - those are the Springs.
This week we will flesh out the charge to love our neighbors - not with just a "Hey, how's it going?" but a "Hey John, how are things going with your mother?" Before we can really move forward in this area, we need to be honest about where we are? If you are a genuinely friendly sort that loves to go out and meet people on a regular basis, what are some of the things you talk about to get into the conversation? If you are that one-on-one coffee person like knitgirl, what are some ways that you have discovered to crossover from chit-chat to meaningful conversation? All of us need each other, so don't sit back and ponder this week? Join the conversation and maybe by the end of the week, we are telling neighbor-meeting stories!
Now, I'm even a little excited and energized to go out and meet a new neighbor. If it weren't 10pm, I might just go do it right now! Tomorrow will have to do.
Bill Hybels, (at the time, Executive Pastor, Willow Creek Community Church) used to regularly address his staff in weekly meetings with, "So, how are you doing REALLY?" It's amazing to me how disarming such a simple question is when paired with direct eye contact. That almost always bridges the gap between chit chat and deeper, more gut-level conversations.
ReplyDelete"Trepidation" would be an accurate description of the feeling I get when I think about just meeting my neighbors. I haven't even met most of them, so how do I even get started?
I think one way is to become aware of your surroundings. Have you noticed the one neighbor who gardens on a regular basis?--stop to comment on their nice yard, or ask them for advice for your yard. I would wave at the same lady almost daily for a year before I met her. I'd wave at her from my car as I drove past, but it wasn't until I was actually OUT of my car and walking my dog that I took the time to stop and introduce myself. (note that it was a full YEAR before I met her--she forgave me because she had not introduced herself, either! It goes both ways, so don't forget that.)
ReplyDeleteINTENTIONAL is a huge word for me. I must be think creatively to meet him/her. (And, it's equally as hard for "talkers" as it is for "non-talkers.")
Walk your dog. Wash your car in your driveway. (this one always gets a comment from someone--they want you to wash their car, too!) Save money by doing your own yard, rather than hiring someone to do it for you. Organize a block party. Risk looking goofy and regularly sit in a lawn chair in front to read, then wave to cars as they pass.
Ask a fellow Springs friend to join/help you.
"Intentional" is a great word. During the short days, like we have now, our moments are extremely limited with our neighbors, so be intentional about the moments you choose. Bus stops, trips to the mail box, walks, early weed-pulling. I have one neighbor that always honks his horn when he drives by and sees me. Another neighbor has remodeled his garage into a sports bar, so when the door was up a couple weeks ago, I went over and said hello and introduced myself. It turns out he's picking up golf and we are going to go play soon. I didn't have to go over, but I was intentional.
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